How I Stopped Bitching

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I’ve been complaining a lot recently about how my life sucks. In my opinion, there hasn’t been enough work in the past three months. The newest round of complaints fell into the ears (rather, eyes, as we only chat online) of my dear friend Sam, who is the unfortunate soundboard of my carping these days. I was grumbling last night about how I can’t afford the shoe brand that I want for Svet, in preparation for her going to school this Monday.

Before you start laughing at my source of grieving, let me tell you that growing up, my sisters and I didn’t have much. Our shoes and uniform were rarely new at the start of the school year. We can hardly afford the books required by the school we went to. So I hope you understand why I’m depressed at not being able to provide those things for my daughter so easily. I felt last night like I was the  most horrible mom on earth, yet I cannot do anything about it.

Sam and I go through the same money hardships lately and we have the same line of work, so opening up to her comes easy for me. She gets me like no one else does and she is a good listener. I can go on and on about something, and she’d just listen and share a similar story. It makes me feel better, because every time I talk to her, I know I’m not alone.

Last night was different. Sam wasn’t about to share my woes, no. Instead, she told me she learned that one of her close friends is battling Stage 3 breast cancer. The friend’s jobless because of her ailment. She has three children, and hasn’t gone to a single chemo session because of the lack of money. Yet still, Sam says her friend is positive that everything will be alright.

Right then and there, I broke down like a goddamn baby. There I was, bitching about my lack of money, not realizing I have a lot less to complain about and a lot, lot more to be thankful for. I usually am satisfied with my life and with what little I have. A not-so-easy life growing up has taught me that. I lost perspective for a while in there, and this brave, brave stranger whose name I don’t even know slams all the focus back into my face.

A list of things I’m thankful for today:

  1. I am still alive.
  2. I am healthy.
  3. I am able to work.
  4. My family is healthy.
  5. My family has wonderfully supported me through this hard time.
  6. We still have money to buy food.
  7. We rent a comfortable house.
  8. The internet is fast.
  9. Svet picked up her art supplies from the floor after using them.
  10. Sam and her friend.

And you know what, my day is just starting. And I already have an old design client waiting. Thank you Jesus.

6 Responses

  1. Naalala ko tuloy sabi ni yobib kay yena, ate mas mahal pa bag mo sa bag ko ha! Sabi nya, ok lng naman daddy kc mahal mo naman ako! Hehehe

    I understand u girl. We want to give the best sa ating mga junakis. Ako rin I complain a lot pero now eto na po magbbago na po ako pramis hehhe

    Aymeshue girl! Sana miss mo rin ako hehee

  2. I feel you, sometimes I whine about how sometimes my life sucks, but then reality bites me in the ass and I am thankful that I am in fact doing good… Here’s to more jobs in your future!

  3. You are not alone. From time to time I complain a lot forgetting the goodness of God in my life. But I thank God because He has ways to catch my attention and let me see the blessings He has showered me and my family.Well, He probably knows me better than I know myself.

    Btw, I noticed there is a problem with tab and the focus of the controls. I am using Google Chrome 27.x

  4. Your post is an eye-opener marce…sometimes I only think about myself on why we don’t have this or that and forgetting to thank God for what He has given us. If I have to count the blessings like comfortable place to rent, job, good health and many more, I could say I’m indeed blessed beyond I deserve:) Hugs, marce. God sees our needs and He’ll surely supply at His timetable. Stay blessed:)

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